The Deal Is!

There are different reasons why women and men cheat, but it basically boils down to the same, ego.  When one’s ego has taken a hit some people fail to communicate this to each other and instead seek others to fill the void which is never the right answer.  If you believe you have a cheating girlfriend this article may help you understand why.  Read below to see some of the main reasons both sexes will cheat.

Women-

• Lack Of Sex-It’s false to believe that women do not need sex as much as men do.  Women need just as much as men and some even need more.  Women have a need to feel “wanted.”  This can be accomplished with date nites, flirting and just simply cuddling and kissing your mate, she will then be less likely to seek that fulfillment elsewhere.
• Being The “Bad Girl”-Again this is an ego driven need.  Just as a man needs to be “macho” sometimes, a women has her own ideas of prowess.  Perhaps it’s sparked by a change in job which makes her feel more powerful or a major weight-loss that sweeps away previous inhibitions she may have felt. Or it could simply be a new group of friends and opportunities that she was not aware existed.  Whatever the reason it is very important to keep the lines of communication open and talk about how she feels and listen to her needs.  Your open ear will go a long way to making her feel content where she’s at and less likely to stray.
• Low Self Esteem-If a woman feels self conscious about herself and you don’t try to do or say anything to make her feel good about who she is, or what she represents to you, she may very well listen to a stranger in the night who does.  Give her compliments about how she looks, how she did her hair or makeup, how a certain article of clothing fits her nicely etc.  A small compliment to a woman really can make a  big difference.
• Revenge-Some women cheat to get even with their spouse. Maybe you’ve cheated on her and she’s hurt now and wants to let you know how it feels.  Even though you can’t take back your wrong-doings you can show your remorse with your current and future actions.  Don’t remain friends with old girlfriends, don’t put yourself in situations where other women are prevalent and your mate is not involved.  Also, offer to seek couples therapy to help restore your relationship if that is what’s needed.
• Lack Of Intimacy-You may have all the things money can buy and stability and financial security, but that is not enough for a woman.  Again she needs to feel wanted and cared for on an emotional level. Make dinner for two, plan a romantic spontaneous evening out, surprise her with flowers, give her a foot massage, let her know you are thinking of her.
• Feeling Under Appreciated-Women tend to be the caretaker in the relationship, making appointments, cleaning house, taking care of children, taxiing around the children, cooking, and working full time to boot!  When your girl starts to feel like her emotional bank is only giving withdrawals and nothing is being deposited, she can tire of that and look for emotional fulfillment outside the relationship.  it’s important to thank her for what she does, recognize her efforts and be sure to do your share around the house.  You can’t quit your job but you can pitch in to let her know you care.
• Your Emotional Withdrawal-Women are driven, by and large, by emotions.  You need to continue to connect with her, share your innermost feelings with her, she is your mate and needs to know that you trust her and need her in that way.  Once you begin withholding that emotional contact the woman will sense it and will feel the relationship is over because you have emotionally “checked out.” To her a breakup is sure to happen at that point.  Keep yourself connected with her, tell her how you feel.
• Blah In The Bedroom-Doing everything the same way or at the same time as if on a schedule takes the romance and spontaneity out of it. Make out with her in the movies or just kiss her in public for no reason at all. Plan a surprise weekend get away for just the two of you, she will remained intrigued and interested in what’s going to happen next. This will pique her interest in you, instead of someone else surprising her when you aren’t.

• Insecurity-Men are emotional creatures they just don’t admit it nor do they generally represent what we think touchy-feely looks like, if a man feels under appreciated he will look elsewhere for that praise and he may very well find it in another woman. Men need to be thanked and verbally stroked.  Tell your guy that you appreciate what he does for you or the family.
• Options-Men are generally not offered sex as frequently as women so when the opportunity presents itself, it’s hard for a man to say no.  Most of the time they won’t or they will start flirting and taking it to the next level and consider that since they didn’t penetrate the girl they didn’t cheat.  Well that is absolutely not true, when you share yourself in any way with the opposite sex, you are cheating.  Sharing emotions, feelings, or physical activity is cheating.  Men and women can not be friends! We were put on this planet to mate together and procreate, trying to be “friends” with the opposite sex is wasted effort, it will never work, not if you are or plan to be in a relationship.
•  To Be Sneaky-Some men cheat simply to find out if they are smart enough to get away with it.  The old adage, “what she doesn’t know won’t hurt her.” Only thing is most women these days are not stupid enough to sit idly by and let men “get away with it”.
• Revenge Cheating-Maybe you’ve cheated on him and really hurt him.  He will try to fix that insecurity with a bandage of another woman in bed.  It is only a bandage though and will not fix the real problem which is between the two of you and has to deal with your relationship.
• It Was Pardoned In The Past-Maybe he’s cheated before and you overlooked it.  Well, if you didn’t do anything to “fix” the relationship and the real reason why he cheated to begin with then you are in for a world of hurt because he will do it again. He will do it because you have trained him that he can do the same thing and expect the same results. There are no consequences for his actions.  You can compare dealing with men to the like of having a dog or raising children, if you let your dog pee or poo on the floor and don’t hold it to a consequence, your carpet will be wretched in no time.  Same with a child if you always allow the child’s poor behavior to occur and there is no punishment, the behavior will become commonplace. 
• Change-Simply put no one wants to eat the same thing day in and day out.  The same rings true in a relationship.  Men just like women, want variety.  The difference between men and women is that women are a far more mentally advanced species.  They have the ability to reason why sleeping around may not be the best thing for the relationship or the family.  Men on the other hand are more animalistic, they do not often consider the consequences and many times do not know how to sign off on what they are feeling, nor do they want to take the time to do so.  When was the last time you heard a man say he was feeling stressed or confused about life and was thinking of going to see someone about it.  Men are raised to be strong and resilient and to take what they want from this world.  After all it is a man’s world no matter how much us women may not like to believe it.  So no wonder they feel a sense of entitlement or a “right” to choose another woman.  They unfortunately are too naive to see how it will not benefit them in the end.

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